Monday, January 23, 2012

Understanding Conflict Between Ministry Leaders

In the real world, not everything goes well, not everyone is happy, there is always bad news as well as good, troubled waters as well as smooth.Very few ministry leaders fail because of their inability to deal with success. Typically, failure in ministry results from an inability to deal with problems.Conflict  resolution within the church can be very difficult.  Some action, even if that is deliberate non action, must take place. 

Lets take a look at the 5 basic principles of conflict; 

  
1. Conflict is normal and not all conflict is  
  bad.

Some conflict is creative and has real positive uses. Sometimes its just a matter of differing life styles or opinions. Resolved properly these can be very use full


2. Good conflict may deepen superficial relationships

Many times relationships are very shallow and people never get close enough to ever even have a conflict.  Very often when a disagreement occurs the relationship between the two parties deepen, because they have come to know each other better. 


3. Personal growth often occurs through dissonance

Dissonance simply means lack of agreement.   Growth often occurs because the social  turbulence causes people to look for  resolution there fore resulting in personal growth.

Within the body of Christ and among men and women of goodwill, conflict is common, not always bad, and can have positive outcomes.

Scripture offer many examples of conflict in the new testament

  

4. A model of advocacy may appear to be contention when it is not    
    really conflict

This can be an effective way to reach decisions.  If a group in a room brings together their own  passionate opinions and each expresses  them strongly. A disagreement can result.

But done correctly and in humility the end can result in a balanced and successfully outcome and decision.


5. There is a Biblical pattern for resolving conflict.

Matthew 18-15,16 gives a pattern for resolving conflict. 

 15 “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’[a] 17 And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.


Five Basic Causes of Conflict



1. Conflict is frequently because of  unmatched expectations

These can lead to disappointment which leads to loss of confidence, and can arise from misunderstandings.

A different set of expectations of a leader, program, style, etc is a certain recipe for conflict


2. Conflict is caused by the mounting number of buried hurts,  
    slights, and insults.

These hurts are often times collected up and saved. Burying feelings , disappointments, personal injuries, etc is  a  deadly illness in the church. It is very unhealthy to bury your hurts..

They will come out someday and in a big way.

Many times conflict between two people in the church is from a gradual buildup of hurt and disappointment


3. A major cause of conflict is unexpressed fears.   (and jealousy)

People may find themselves resisting others because of fears that may have never been expressed.

It is easy to become paranoid in the church. It is easy to be fearful about what might happen in situations involving other Christians.

If these fears are never expressed, they can never be countered, they can never be checked out, so they can never be resolved.


4. Competition for limited resources can cause conflict.

There is never enough money, time or attention in the work of the church. 

Church leaders are many times placed in a situation where there is competition for your time and attention.

The leader must respond by constantly reassuring people in an atmosphere of fairness so that conflict won’t occur

If someone gets the feeling that they  are not valued as highly as someone else, conflict will occur


5. Conflict escalates in a hostile and failing environment.

A psychological study shows that if people or animals are put in situations in which pain is delivered and discomfort is created, individuals or animals will always  turn on each  and start fighting

So basically when things are not going well they just get worse. Conflict will occur and resolve must be obtained.  In a hostile environment people will lash out even when they are not meaning it personally or have any real reason for doing so.

Understanding what causes conflict will help us as leaders to understand how to deal with the problem and what if anything needs to be done at the time. Next time I will ocer how to handle conflict between ministry leaders..




Saturday, January 21, 2012

Faith Without Works is Dead

Faith Without Works is Dead



Faith without works is like a bird without wings; though she may hop around with her companions on earth, yet she will never fly with them to heaven.     Francis  Beaumont 


The last topic we discussed on living  a fulfilled Christian life was tithing on your income.  You are  called to tithe the first fruits of everything and that includes your time .  I know that the world today is a twenty six  hour day on a twenty four hour clock. No one has time  for anything.  Just how could we live without texting, email, and the microwave?  Ask your Grandmother, she did it just fine. I know we are all very busy. Life today demands it in most professions, not to mention  raising a family, church, and social events.

James tells us in  James chapter two starting in verse fourteen and following that faith without works is dead.  I understand that our salvation is not based on works and that we cannot work our way into Heaven by the good things  we do. But if we have faith in Christ and do not work for the Kingdom of God, are we really disciples of Christ?

James continues to say that he will show his faith by his works, he goes on to say that it is good that we say we know God, but that even demons know God and tremble at His name. But if we say we have faith and do not have works, our faith is dead faith .

So what are the works James is referring to in this text?  Well one example he gives is;  if  a brother or sister is naked and hungry  and you simply pray for them and tell them to depart in peace, be warm and filled, but you do not give them what they are in need of , what has been accomplished?

As Christians wishing to live a successful and fulfilled life we must become involved in the work of the local church. This does not necessarily mean teaching or even being seen in the light.  Churches by their very nature are organizations that require people to become involved in every level to ensure that they are successful. That may mean helping out on a work day, being on the kitchen fellowship committee, helping in the food bank or homeless shelter, or being an usher or greeter. Everything you do to show the love of Christ is Christian works.

Sitting in the pew and sneaking home at the   altar call will not make for a fulfilled life. God wants you to become involved, become intentional about living a Godly life. Stop for just a moment  and think about something that you are good at, that is the gift that God gave you,  how can you use that gift to bless others and show the love of Christ ?

Are you a carpenter ? I bet a few older people in the church could use a blessing of some home repairs that they cannot afford to pay for. How about an auto mechanic ? You are always hearing of people with car trouble that they can’t afford the labor rates to have it fixed, the elderly, single parents, those on fixed incomes. Anything you do in the name of Jesus is a blessing to others.  If you’re a stay at home mom maybe you have time to help someone clean their house, or maybe cook dinner once a week for an older couple.

God can use you to bless others if you will only take the time to find out where you can be used.  Being used for good works and as a blessing to others,  is essential in striving for a fulfilled Christian life.  I have been told many stories where someone has set out to be a blessing in someone’s life and in return they themselves were blessed.

I read somewhere that Bible study alone will make carnal Christians, and it will not produce spirituality.   It went on to explain that study without service produces Christians with judgmental attitudes and spiritual pride. 

That’s the same reason a closed in pond will go stagnant. Water comes in, but none ever goes out. Without the outpouring of your faith through missions, evangelism, or ministry, your faith will go stagnant.


Remember, faith without works is dead faith.


Wednesday, January 4, 2012

New Year; Resolve not Resolutions


As our New Year has gotten under way I wanted to speak for just a moment on the old practice of New Year Resolutions.  You know the ones, we are going to lose 20 pounds, spend more time with family, pay off that credit card once and for all.  But in most cases we have all but forgotten our plans by March.

It’s an industry fact that gyms and sports clubs make a large percentage of their membership income in the first two months of the year and then by summer are not spending any  extra money on staff because the majority of the new members have never shown back up.

I suggest that rather than making resolutions, that we make resolve.  Make a commitment.  In the book of Philippians, Paul tells us that he is pushing toward the goals ahead.  That is what I mean. Push toward your goals. The best way to accomplish this is to set your plans in God’s will and for His glory.

Let me give you an example. If you want to lose that next 20 pounds, make a commitment to God to lose the weight for a God honoring purpose and for His glory through testimony.   Paying off your credit card will make you a better steward of your money so that you will have more for missions and work in the local church.

You see, making a resolve to do something is setting your mind on that idea with purpose and stubborn to the cause. Further, making the commitment to God is binding and is a strong motivator.  I don’t want to purposely lie to God, do you?

Finally find an accountability partner. Someone you trust   that you will agree can hold you to your goal. It is always better to put someone over you in reaching for your goals. 

Finally,  pray. In everything you do, pray. If you will pray and let God lead your path you will accomplish great things. Remember that in all you do, do it for the glory and honor of the Lord. Anything else is just selfish ambition